Butternut Squash Soup

Today I was loving the fall colors and the smell in the air and it made me crave soup. I tend to crave soup on fallish days and cold days, I'm sure everyone is that way. I went to you tube of all places and typed in "butternut squash soup" and a little video popped up that looked good and sounded easy. The website is www.harvesteating.com
You can then look up Butternut squash soup. It turned out really good if I do say so myself. It satisfied my fall soup craving. I also bought a good bread to go with it. We all decided the soup tasted better with a bit of sour cream as well. It was lacking something and the sour cream did the trick. The recipe also calls for one medium sized squash, I would add a little more to make it thicker. I would've liked ours better if it was thicker. I love fall. It always makes me think of being a kid in Logan, Utah. It makes me think of trick-or-treating in the snow, the spook alley that was in the basement of the old library, my mom's soups and the colors up Logan Canyon. This time of the year always makes me a little homesick. I loved sitting with the family tonight at the table, eating soup and laughing. Miles was eating pancakes and done before the rest of us and then he was running around like a maniac while the rest of us ate and talked. That's how most of our meals are. If any of you make this recipe, let me know what you think or if you have one you make that you really like, pass it on.

My sweet girl

Today is picture day at school so Sofi wanted me to do something special to her hair. She had it relaxed almost a month ago and she has loved it. While the woman was doing Sofi's hair I could literally see her pulling the curl out of Sofi's hair. Whatever she put on her hair did wonders. It's that age old story of a girl with curly wanting straight and then there are girls with straight that want curly. For those of you who have felt Sofi's hair before you know it's the nappiest hair ever. I find these little circles of hair around the house and you can pull one end of it out and it's almost 5 inches long and let go and it goes back to this little circle of hair. The girl has the curliest hair I've ever seen. When she was little it wasn't that curly but when it started coming in more it went crazy.
One time when Sofi was about 2 she was standing at the counter in the kitchen and she took a metal fastener out of her hair and was about to put it in a light socket. I told her she needed to give it to me. Next thing I know she's flinging back and falling on the ground and smoke was coming out of the socket. She was fine but maybe that was the turning point for her hair :) This morning while blow drying her hair and then straightening it she got all excited and said "today I get a plastic comb". I had no idea what she was talking about so I asked. Just a little FYI for those that don't know, Sofi is in 5th grade now. She said that when they take school photo's they offer each kid their own plastic comb to fix their hair and this would be the first year she would be able to get a comb and use it. I almost started to cry. In the past Sofi has had her hair in cornrows, extensions, poofs and headbands for her school photo's. Now with her hair relaxed it lays completely down and she can comb through it. It made me sad that she was so excited to get this plastic comb today. I have watched her out of the corner of my eye as she looks longingly at her friends as they run their hands through their hair, or as Kiah brushes her own hair or puts it up in a ponytail. It's hard to watch.
It's so fun to watch her now as she looks in the mirror and tries all kinds of new styles with her hair. It sounds so superficial but it's a big deal to her. It's a matter of feeling more like the other girls instead of different. Which at this age, they don't want to be. I'm excited for Sofi today too and that she gets to use the plastic comb. Go Sofi!!!

A little late but hopefully not too late

I wanted to write up a short note about Mexico since I somehow never did. I went straight from Mexico to foot injury and have forgotten how fun the trip was and how beautiful. It was our 20th anniversary so we needed to do something special. On our honeymoon we stayed in a tiny cabin in Yellowstone with a wood burning stove and no bathroom.
While that was romantic and all we could afford at that time, 20 yrs later needed to be something bigger. We were gone for 9 days. We first went to Cozumel, which I loved and would like to go back and spend the whole vacation on that island. The water was amazing and the resort we stayed at was magical. We took a boat back to the main island and from there we rented a car and went inland to see ruins. We saw Coba, Chichen Itza and Uxmal. Uxmal was my favorite one of all.
We stayed at a Hacienda on our anniversary. It was kind of out in the middle of nowhere so I was a bit apprehensive about the accommodations, it ended up being the most beautiful place we stayed at. Mark had arranged for us to have our dinner outside but it started to rain so we ate on our veranda. It was delicious. The pool there was the coolest and after a hot muggy day it felt good to swim in. The place we stayed at has also accommodated Sting and President Bush. It was gorgeous. Definitely a step up from a little cabin in Yellowstone. We drove back to the coast and stayed in Tulum which is a cute little beach town. It was at the Tulum ruin that I fell and hurt my ankle and foot. Now 2 months later I've been put through the ringer because of that fall. I still have great memories of the trip and loved every minute of it.

bye bye baby

My baby started Kindergarten this week. Where did all that time go. I swear he was just in diapers yesterday and drinking from a bottle. Now he's starting school and it's feels strange. I had mixed emotions when I dropped him off, it was sad yet having sent two other kids to Kindergarten and survived I knew I would be fine with Miles gone. It also helped that it was a nice sunny day and I went and visited a friend. The teacher had the kids line up against the wall and wait until all the kids had shown up and then she marched them down to their classroom. He is so much taller than the other kids that he looks a bit out of place yet emotionally he's the same as the others. Miles had brought in a shirt the night before class and asked me if it was "special" and should he wear it to school? I went into his room and he had his backpack and clothes all laid out and ready to go. When we were leaving to go to school he asked me if there would be a "welcome party" for him when he got there. I love that he was that excited and that he knows to feel welcomed and cared for, instead of feeling scared and alone. It does feel strange to be sending my last child to school. Kindergarten isn't really long enough to do anything but it is enough to have a break. It just feels strange to have him gone during the day and to know he is growing up. He's been such a momma's boy and I hope that doesn't change. When he got off the bus the first day I was ready to take photo's of him getting off the bus. He ran at me so fast yelling "mommy" that I had to brace myself so I wouldn't fall down. He's a lean kid but he's strong! That made me more weepy than when I dropped him off at school. It feels good to know you are still loved.

Last hoorah of summer

I have been stuck in the house far too long this summer because of my ankle and foot. On Sunday after church Mark called to tell me he was on his way home after meetings and it popped into my head that I wanted to go camping. Mark would never say "no" to camping so he came home and we packed up in record time and headed off to go camping. We didn't get to our campsite until about 8:45pm, so we just sat up camp and went to bed. There is a fire ban so when it's 9ish at night out in the middle of nowhere, with no fire going on, there isn't much to do but go to sleep. Because of going to bed so early, we woke up early. Mark, Miles and I took the canoe out while the girls slept and it was completely peaceful. It was just what I needed. There were no sounds, the sun was out and the scenery was amazing. Plus I was with my two favorite guys. What more can you ask for? Oh and I had a cold coke waiting for me back at camp. That topped it off. We played by the river for a while and then headed down to cooper lake to go swimming in a swimming hole that Mark knew about. It was the coldest water I've ever gone swimming in, but it was just that initial freezing, it got better. We played for a while and then headed home. It was short but sweet and just what the doctor ordered. Well actually my doctor would most likely be upset if he knew I was out and about on my foot but I had about had it and I needed to be enjoying the last days of summer. Hope you enjoy the video that Mark made.

Double digits baby!!!!!

Sofi just turned 10 and had been counting down the days for her double digit birthday. It's so strange that she is already 10. It seems like yesterday that Mark and I flew to Florida to adopt Sofi. We had got a call the week before she was born from a lawyer in Florida that we had sent our adoption papers to. A Birth Mother had seen our portfolio and had chosen us. I can remember it so clearly. We flew to Florida on a Sunday and Sofi had been born on Saturday afternoon. We went with a car carrier and that was all we had. We flew in around 2am on Monday morning slept a bit and then got up to go to the hospital. It was so surreal and like I was floating on clouds and that the clouds were carrying me from one stage of the adoption process to the next. We met the lawyer at the hospital, signed papers (he only cared about the check and asked about it a couple of times, what a loser),and then went upstairs to the nursery. It was so strange to one minute have it be Mark, Kiah and I and then in the next have a nurse point to a crib and say "there's your baby girl." They told me to sit in a rocking chair and then they gave me Sofi. I held her while Mark made tons of phone calls to family and friends. I fell in love with her instantly and it's been pure love ever since. I can't imagine my life without Sofi, I can't imagine our family without her. It's like there was this spot in our home, in every picture, at the dinner table, while saying prayers, while going on vacations that was just waiting for Sofi to fill it. It truly feels like I was just in that rocking chair holding her and looking at her beautiful big eyes and holding her little fist in mine just yesterday. Now she is almost as tall as I am, she is a spunky, feisty, fashionable little 10 yr old. I'm so glad she is in my life. Happy 10th Sofi!!!

You breath in when I breath out

I found this video on a blog recently and loved the song and video. It made me cry actually, well not cry as so much as bring a tear to my eyes. Being immobile like I have, I have been counting on people and needing more support than ever. I loved this video in the sense that we all need that extra support every so often and it's good to know that there is someone there to catch you when you need it. I have been lucky this summer to have great family and friends that have done just that. They've given me hugs when I needed them, and catch me when I need help. I know that there are things far worse than having foot surgery and that this is small compared to other things. I'm just not use to being stuck in the house or not being able to go and do as I please. It's been a test to say the least. Why have I never heard of this group before? They are from Scotland and their accents give me goosebumps( I have this thing, a bit of a crush when it comes to Scottish accents). The video is good and the song is even better.

Loving me some Rilke

I think because I'm down and can't do a lot that I've been thinking of all the things I can't do. I've been known to complain a tad(Mark will laugh about this) about walking and hiking. Of course now that there is no possible way for me to do either, I missing it. Maybe this will be my HUGE motivation to get out there more and hike. I was reading from a book I have of Rilke's poems and I found this one. For now I guess I will enjoy Mark's photo's and read about walking and hiking instead. Enjoy.


A Walk

My eyes already touch the sunny hill.
going far ahead of the road I have begun.
So we are grasped by what we cannot grasp;
it has inner light, even from a distance-

and charges us, even if we do not reach it,
into something else, which, hardly sensing it,
we already are; a gesture waves us on
answering our own wave...
but what we feel is the wind in our faces.

by Rainer Maria Rilke

Going Stir crazy

I think after my foot is all healed and I can be more mobile I am going to rearrange and decorate my room. After staring at it for so long because of this stupid ankle, I've about had it with the view. After looking around at my room for weeks now I think it's time for a change. I haven't had much to write about since I haven't really done a lot since getting back from Mexico. It has been a bit of a bummer actually but I am on the mend and I think I see the light. You will notice in the photo's that they are all taken from the same angle, it's not exciting but I thought I would share. Enjoy and if you have any decorating suggestions, fire away.

U2 and MRI's

You might ask what U2 and MRI's have in common? Nothing would be my answer. Last week though I had my first MRI (of my right ankle that I hurt in Mexico). I'm very happy that it was my ankle and not my head or body because I think I would maybe go insane or need some drugs to sedate me a little before hand. I was very happy that I could choose music to listen to for the 45 minutes that I had to lay completely still. I chose U2 but it was a toss up between that and Bob Marley. I was afraid I would want to dance a little if it were Bob so I went with U2's greatest hits. It helped and I was so glad that I could listen to music to tone down the loud sound of the MRI machine. Have you seen one of those before? They are huge and so loud. As I lay there on the table being completely still yet holding on to a buzzer thing that I could push if I needed help (yet was told not to because they would have to stop the procedure), I kept thinking that it would be something simple like a sprain and nothing more. Unfortunately it's not something simple like a sprain and I have to have surgery on the 11th of August. I ruined some of the cartilage in my ankle and some of the ligaments. How bizarre is this though. They will drill into the bone and let the blood seep out into my ankle which it will form new cartilage. He also has to repair some of the ligaments. If that surgery doesn't take, then they will take cartilage from a cadaver and place it in my ankle/foot. How fun does that sound? Tons, I know. I then will be on crutches for 6 weeks, the boot after that for a couple weeks and then physical therapy.
I have a great orthopedic surgeon though that a friend referred me to and I feel completely safe in his hands. Unfortunately the podiatrist that I went to before him told me it was just a sprain and to wear the boot for a week and then take it easy. I wont be going back to him any time soon. I'm not looking forward to surgery. I have a bit of a fear of surgery and being put under. I'm glad though to be getting my foot worked on and hopefully strengthening it. I can think of funner things I'd rather be doing this summer but I know it will be better in the long run. If you have any movie(DVDs) or book suggestions send them my way. I will have plenty of time to watch them and to read.

Wisdom teeth are HUGE!

I just got back from taking Kiah to get her wisdom teeth taken out. They wrapped her teeth up in a nice little packet and gave them to me. I took one look and had to put them away. It's been so long since I had mine taken out that I don't even know if my parents kept mine or not but those things are HUGE. No wonder we have to have them taken out, there wouldn't been any space in our mouth for them. I feel bad that we had to wait for our insurance to roll over again for the new year, because by the time I took her in, they had all pushed up through the skin. She was scheduled for tomorrow and today I called to see if there was any way to get her in because she's been in so much pain. Luckily they had a cancellation and were able to fit Kiah in. She was one loopy person when they wheeled her out to the car. She kept poking at her lips and gum's. I would tell her to just lay back and sleep but she would pull the mirror down and poke at her face and try to talk to me and say how huge her face was. It was a bit entertaining to say the least. I had my wisdom teeth taken out when I was 16. My parents didn't have the greatest dental insurance and had to pay for it out of their pocket. They weren't so happy to hear I had 6 wisdom teeth. It was a joke for a long time that I couldn't just have 4 like everyone else but that I had to have 6 and it was 100$ a tooth. My dad only had 2, his parents were probably very happy. I think Kiah will do great and recover fast. She has a pretty high pain tolerance and she is young. It's just hard to watch her go through all these steps that get her closer to leaving the house. Like turning 16, dating, driving, next year she's a senior, getting her wisdom teeth taken out. All those teenage milestones that get her closer to becoming an adult. I will have to take some good photo's later of her, swollen cheeks and all.

Photo's from a funeral

I hope a couple of these photo's aren't looked at as morbid but that you can sense the happiness that we all felt at Grandma Smith's funeral knowing that she was with her husband and parents and other family members that have passed on. These photo's show the great posterity she left and the family that came together to honor her and her life.

Softly and Tenderly Jesus is Calling

Mark's sweet Grandma Smith passed away last Sunday and we drove to Rigby, Idaho for the funeral on Wednesday. Her daughter-in-law and two of her granddaughters sang the song "Softly and Tenderly Jesus is Calling" at the funeral as per her request. It was hard to not cry and also hard to not have a big smile on our faces because she has been ready to go for a long time. Her first husband passed away when Mark was probably a year old and then her second husband passed away in 1992. She has missed him very much and has said for the longest time that she was ready to go and be with her "Howard." She also loved to tell us that she could be taken at any moment because she was humble after all. We haven't seen Grandma Smith for a few years because of her health and because of the distance. We were in her area last Thanksgiving and would've gone to see her but she didn't know who anyone was anymore and Mark wanted to remember her when she was spunky and had her memory. I think it would've been too hard to see her the way she has been the last few years. I wanted to list a few things that I remember about Beula and that I will treasure about her. When they had the Teton Dam flood in 1976 there was tons and tons of fabric that people thought had been ruined by the flood and people were just going to throw it away. Mark's Grandparents (being the resourceful people they were) knew they could wash it and reuse a lot of it. Grandma Smith washed tons of fabric and cloth and made quilts for people who had lost blankets due to the flood and then later she made quilts for her family. We have a quilt with some of that material. Mark's Grandma also made our wedding cake. It was three layers and was beautiful. It had red roses on it. Her and Howard also cooked a lot of the food that we had at our reception. Grandma Smith loved her flower garden and took care of it with such love and grace. The flowers in her backyard were immaculate. Grandma Smith also had rows and rows of raspberries. If we ever stopped by her place in the summer we would go outside and pick raspberries and sit and eat in the backyard and talk to her. She wouldn't let us leave without taking some jars of bottled raspberries. They were delicious.Grandma also flew out to California when Kiah was baptized and then when we went to the Temple with Sofia later that day. She was so happy to be there with us and her family. Grandma Smith had many trials in her life and a lot of them brought on by her own family members but she never gave up and her faith never wavered. Mark's uncle Doug and his family did a video one night a few years ago of Grandma and interviewed her, they wanted to ask a bunch of questions about her life before she couldn't remember anymore. They asked at the end of the CD what she would like to tell her family, that she would want them to remember. She said " to always stay close to their Heavenly Father and to always bear their Testimony of him." Then they asked if she would like to sing a song and she sang the one I mentioned above. It was so sweet. She will be missed but at the same time, she lived a full life. She was 86 when she passed away. We all know she is with her "Howard" and as happy as can be.

My baby is growing up!

Miles lost his first tooth this past week. His permanent tooth had popped up behind his baby tooth and the baby tooth had been loose for a while. Sofi came home one day and told Miles that his baby tooth was bleeding and could she wipe it with some toilet paper? He is not wise to the ways of an older sister that has had this same trick pulled on her by her dad. She grabbed the tooth of course and yanked it out without him knowing that she did it on purpose. He just thought it came out on it's own. He was so excited and is still excited that he lost a tooth and had the visit from the Tooth Fairy ( 5$ was not my idea, that was Mark's). Sofi sewed a little pouch for him to put under his pillow for the tooth to go in. It was very cute to watch Sofi get all excited and to get Miles more excited than he already was. It's amazing how fast the teeth start to move. His big one is already moving up to where it's suppose to be. Now another is popping up behind a baby tooth. I think the kid is going to need braces. For right now though I'm enjoying these 1st's with my youngest and trying not to think about the day when he will be bigger and when he's not my baby anymore.

Oh no you didn't!!

While at Kiah's state drill competition last month Sofi played with the silly putty that I bought for her and Miles. The competition was an all day event and I knew they would get bored so I packed some things to play with. Silly putty should be safe right? Wrong when your 9 year old thinks it would be funny to put it on her dad's hairy arm. I love the look on his face though and her head peeking through like "am I in trouble?" It took him a while to get it all out and he lost some hair. I thought it was pretty funny actually but then it didn't happen to me.

High Tea with my girls

We went to Vancouver Island for Spring break last week. The first part of the trip we backpacked out to Mystic Beach (which is very beautiful) and the second part was spent in Victoria,BC. There is a Hotel there, the Empress Hotel and it's famous for it's High Tea. Kiah and Sofi wanted to have High Tea but I wasn't about to spend 45$ per person for them to experience it. We instead found a cute little place called the "James Bay Tea Room." It was very cute and quaint and charged 16$ per person instead of the highly overpriced Empress Hotel(which is cool to walk through and walk around the grounds). These are some pic's of our Tea time. They have all these yummy little sandwiches and crumpets with jam. They have herbal tea or caffeinated tea, you choose what you want. I have to explain that the photo at the end is Sofi sad that the tea and all the goodies are gone. I had to add it because Sofi loves to drink hot tea. It's all herbal of course but she drinks it when she gets sick, when it's cold outside and even when it's hot. The girl loves tea with sugar and now that she discovered tea/cream and sugar she wants me to fix it at home. It was a nice time spent with Kiah and Sofi. They were very cute. It was a beautiful day. The only bad part was when I coughed so hard (I'm still dealing with bronchitis) that tea came out my nose. I ran outside to cough so that I didn't scare any of the old people that were there having their tea and crumpets (I think we were the only young people there).

My baby keeps getting older!

Kiah(my oldest) turned 17 today. Next year she will be a senior and then out of the house. I can't believe she is already 17 though. I've always associated this time of the year with three things and all of them to me, mean "life, hope and love." I associate this time of the year to those things because Kiah was born on April 3, it's always around Easter and when she was born it was Conference weekend and here we are again with it being conference weekend. I don't want to brag about Kiah on here (because I could ya know, I am a bit bias and I will brag with photo's instead, hee hee). Except to say she amazed me as a baby, a toddler, in Elementary school, Middle school and now High school years. I love her with all my heart. She means the world to me. Happy Birthday Kiah!





That's my girl!!!

Allergies, Smallergies

I have been consumed by sickness and allergies for a few weeks now that I haven't felt like doing anything. I hope I am coming out of my fog. There is some questionnaire thing floating around on facebook recently and one of the questions was "have you ever hit rock bottom?" I think being sick these past three weeks has definitely been the bottom of something for me. I find it interesting that the first day that I feel some normalcy that we had snow in the morning and then sun ever since. Does anyone else suffer from allergies and have asthma? What do you do during allergy season? Or are you like some of my friends that have never had seasonal allergies a day in their life(I'm not asking that with bitterness at all, ok maybe a little :) ). I'm so excited for summer though. I can't wait to have all the windows open, the sound of bees buzzin' and birds chirping. Bring on the sun!

Helping myself

I recently read a blog post that I totally loved and I wanted to try it myself. This person set a New Years resolution to try to live her life as if she were 20 years older and suddenly had the chance to do go back and do it all over again but knowing what she would know 20 years into the future. I'm 40 now, what would my 60 (HOLY CRAP, I don't want to think of that) year old self say to me now? This is my list of what I think I would say and then I need to take it to heart and truly live by it.

1. Stop worrying what people think of you, most likely they aren't thinking about you. It's not all about you ;)

2. Get up off your butt and start walking and eating better. I know if I don't my 60(HOLY CRAP again) year old self is going to be sore, sick and not very happy.

3. Quit drinking diet coke or any carbonated drink, it's not helping at all.

4. Invite people over more, go out more, be more social. Don't worry if your house isn't clean, if you just don't feel like being social that day, get out and don't think about it too much.

5. Pray more and about everything. Ask for help with your kids, your feelings, your doubts, your fears. Trust more in prayer.

6. Realize that life can be a lot worse. Life is good. Great husband, great kids, supportive family and good friends.

7. LOVE YOURSELF! you are worth it :)

I have lived a great life so far and I want the rest of my life to be even better. What would you tell yourself?

A family that hangs out at the beach together, stays together ;)

Here is my favorite family photo we took at the beach this past weekend. It's very hard to get Miles to stand still long enough for us to get a family shot. Most photo's of the family maybe three of us are looking at the camera but Miles is always this blur. This one turned out though, so it's worth posting. Notice how bundled up Mark, Kiah and I are and then look at Sofi and Miles bare feet. I don't know how they handled it? They were so cute at the beach though. Miles was totally into his kite, Sofi was intent on making a castle and Kiah hung out and talked to Mark and I. It was a great day in Ocean Shores.

a mom and her girls

Who knew life could be so good? Growing up I never thought I'd have such a wonderful family, such great kids and a great husband. I had hoped but I didn't think it would be this good. I really don't have much to say except that I feel really grateful today for my kids and husband. I can't say that having girls is any better than having a son, they are equally wonderful. I love the bond I have with my girls though. Sure we have our differences at times but I love who they are and who they are becoming. Kiah will graduate 2010 and then off to school somewhere. Sofi has 1 1/2 years left of elementary school and then will become a middle school girl! I'm cherishing the moments I have with them, trying to impart whatever words of wisdom I have . Aren't they dang cute? I think so. Kiah loves to talk, tell me every detail of her day, kids at school, boys etc.... Sofi wants me to do crafts with her the minute she gets home until she goes to bed. She likes to talk but not as much as her big sister. Sofi is more soulful, likes to stare out the window and think. Kiah like I said, loves to talk, talk, talk. I'm not complaining. I value the time we have to talk, she has been that way ever since she was little. Kiah cries at movies, laughs hard and is sensitive. Sofi loves to learn, do gymnastics, but to find humor in something it has to be really funny or quirky funny and then she will laugh out loud. I love my girls and I love Miles of course but this is all about the Griffith gals.

Color of Water: A Black man's tribute to his White Mother

This is the title of the last book we read in the book club I'm in. It's written by James McBride and I loved it. I've been telling everyone about it. James writes about his life growing up in Harlem, his life with his siblings and how he saw his mom as a child and then later as an adult. At the beginning of each chapter is an interview of James Mother, Ruth McBride.
She tells about her life growing up with an abusive Jewish Father who treated her mother terribly. She meets her first husband and is disowned by family because he is Black. She converts to Christianity and with her husband co-founded a Baptist church. Her and her first husband had 8 children and James McBride is the last of those 8. His Father passed away before James was born. Later Ruth marries again and with her second husband, raises 12 children. The second husband also passed away leaving Ruth to raise the children by herself. Ruth raises her children to go to the best schools, sometimes busing them all over NY to the best school for each individual child. She raised 12 children that went on to become Doctors, Teachers, Writers, all having successful careers. She is an amazing woman. She was married to two amazing men, who loved her and gave her the respect she never had growing up. I think she is a testament to faith, unconditional love, perseverance and hard work. James gives his Mother a beautiful tribute. If I could be a sliver of what she is as a Mother, then I will feel I have accomplished something. It's a wonderful book, touching, funny at times and one I would recommend to anyone.

Sweet little Miles

Who says boys can't be deep and sensitive? Not me! Tonight while getting Miles to bed we were petting Ebony(the new kitty)and listening to her purr. Miles started talking about Ty our only boy cat we've had and who went missing about a year ago. Once Miles starts talking about Ty (who he loved completely)he gets crying. Tonight was no different. The tears started coming and really big tears. He also was doing that whole take in a deep breath and hold it for a second and then let it out and cry some more. It was making me so sad. He said that when we had Ty it made our home even, three boys and three girls(even though we also had a girl cat but I was not about to get technical with him). He was so sad that our family isn't even anymore. He asked me if I thought Ty was in Heaven, I said "of course he is." Then he asked me if I thought Ty might come back in another kitty's body? I guess my kid believes in reincarnation? Who knew? We had a talk about how Ebony is our new kitty and that we love her and she loves Miles. I told him that one day he would see Ty again but that for now Ty is very happy and will be just fine. Then (and this broke my heart) he asked what would happen if Mark, Kiah, Sofi and I died, would he and Ebony be alone? I don't know what got into his little mind to make him think about such deep and sad things? He's 5 for heaven's sake, he shouldn't worry about stuff like that. He's such a sweet little boy. He's a very tender and sensitive boy, I hope he keeps some of that when he grows up. Not so much that his feelings get hurt too much, but just enough to keep him kind and caring. I had conversations with my girls like this when they were Miles age, but I didn't think I would have them with Miles for some reason. It was wrong of me to assume that little boys aren't sensitive like that. I have been proved wrong over and over again with Miles. I didn't know what a boy would be like but I think I set certain expectations and assumed. I'm glad I've been proved wrong, it's opened my eyes to a whole new world. I love it.

It's been an off week!

I've been having a really off week. For many reasons. Some I'd rather not go into. What I will tell you about though is my Amazon fresh.com ordering and the mistakes I've made. We like to order our food from Amazon fresh and have it delivered early in the morning around 6am and we don't have to be up to sign anything when they drop it off.The items that need to be kept cold are kept with ice bags and so they can stay outside for a while before we even get to them. I also like Amazon fresh because anything over 30$ is free delivery and we always order over 30$. Because of some other things that went on this week that kind of threw me off, when I ordered my items I wasn't exactly thinking correctly. First was when I thought I ordered two boxes of Cinnamon toast crunch cereal and got a big box of 24 boxes. We do love Cinnamon toast crunch but still it's going to take us a while to eat it all. Second was when I ordered two 6 packs of coke(which I should be ordering diet not regular) and got 4, 6 packs instead. I do not need that much coke. Like I said I should be drinking diet coke instead. Hopefully next time I order my brain is working a bit better. I'm just grateful for websites like amazon fresh so that I don't have to shop all the time. It's one of my pet peeves. Plus I discovered one of my new favorite popsicles on amazon fresh and the kids love it as well. You should try it out. It's yummy.
P.S. You have to like the Acai fruit. It's not overly strong in this bar like it is in other products so you don't have to totally love it. Like my husband doesn't totally love it, but loves this bar. I have to hide the box in the freezer from my 5 year old son because he will eat it all gone, but he is a really good eater. Not your typical 5 year old. Try it though and let me know what you think.